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1.800.HORMONES

August 2, 2009

There has been no excuse for my moody behavior lately.  All I can do is chalk it up to hormones, meaning…you don’t want to know.  I have consistently been on the edge of a screaming match with most everyone in my path for about the past infinity hours.  Christopher for insisting we share a living space, Sydney for insisting upon pooping in it, Charter Communications for literally jabbing at my “obnoxious gland” until all I can do is sob in their ear, and finally, Bill Gates for creating Microsoft which in turn created the XBOX which in turn has nearly caused me to cause injury to my husband….and the list goes on.  Each of these entities have in some way done me some great injustice and I absolutely demand their apologies.  That or that they just find it in their heart to leave me alone and let me be.  

That all being said, I’ve been so preoccupied with being right while the rest of the world can’t do anything but be wrong, I nearly forgot that I start my new job tomorrow.  Huzzah, Hooray and God Save The Queen!  I’m so relaxed and un-nervous™ (it’s a word and no you can’t use it) about it that I almost can’t wait to get started.  I really feel deep down in my soul that soon and very soon I’m going to begin looking forward to Monday mornings again.  Call me a sadist…but I believe it could actually be true (unlike most everything else I say here).

In other exciting news I finally received a new washer and dryer.  And when I say new I actually mean that two very awesome friends of ours from church BLESSED us with them out of the goodness of their hearts.  It’s been so long since I have done laundry from the comforts of my own home, that once I was finally given the ability it took me several minutes of looking for the coin slot to realize….I NEVER AGAIN HAVE TO GO ON FUTILE QUARTER HUNTS TO WASH MY TOWELS (God willing)!!!

And because of that and that alone, this has been the most gratifying weekend of my young life.  As much as that may seem a gross exaggeration…I assure you it is not.

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7 Comments leave one →
  1. jimbarnard permalink
    August 2, 2009 11:45 pm

    yea!! new job tomorrow!! good luck with that and enjoy it. others are jealous.

  2. Bill Gates (pretender) permalink
    August 3, 2009 4:51 am

    Sorry about XBOX. But it is better than A-WBox that no one would buy. Any way I retired and if you could send your future complaints to Steve Ballmer I would appreciate it.

    Hey did you know Paul Allen the leader of Charter Communications was also a founder of Microsoft so you can complain to him twice. I have forwarded your complaint to him.

    Sorry for making you unhappy but it is the only way we get your attention.

    Best Wishes… Bill Gates (pretender)

  3. Steve Ballmer (pretender) permalink
    August 3, 2009 4:55 am

    Bill was is charge for most of the XBOX I was really incharge of XBOX 360 which I did not hear you complain about. Bill is right though Paul is kind of a jerk for not treating you better on your cable TV stuff. I also think XBOX was Paul’s idea.

    Sincerely, Steve Ballmer (pretender)

  4. Paul Allen (pretender) permalink
    August 3, 2009 5:01 am

    Bill called me up complaining about how you feel about me, Charter and Microsoft. I had almost nothing to do with XBOX. I am just a stock holder and board member at Charter. Please don’t hate me because I have made billions upon billions.

    By the way, I have seen your picture and I think your cute. I am not saying anything but your cute. Thanks for thinking about me.

    With Love, Paul Allen (pretender)

  5. August 3, 2009 8:18 am

    Getting our own washer and dryer was the best thing John and I did for our early marriage. Seriously. The laundry mat was the place where we would both just lose it because we hated being there with the heat of a thousand suns. His idea of folding was pretty much like wadding the garment up into a ball. Yet, nobody could be more meticulous over how shirts and pants are hung on a hanger. Good grief! Of course, nobody folds t-shirts up to my standards, and don’t even get me started on the right and wrong way to put laundry away. I’d go all “Monica Gellar” him, but Monica was much more forgiving than I was. Add this to the fact that there was NO laundry mat in town where people didn’t smoke, so basically we were there to wash, dry, then stinkify our clothes, which put both of us on a slow burn. By the time we got through the folding process, we would barely be speaking to each other.

    Enjoy the new home conveniences… and good luck with the new job!

  6. lifeofaprimadonna permalink
    August 6, 2009 8:56 am

    Hey! It sounds like so many life changes at once is getting the best of you…or coming from a female standpoint…hormones too. Ha ha. Congrats on the new job and honestly gaming systems are a mans way of feeling like he is still 12 and playing the Nintendo (Which BTW I call every gaming system a Nintendo, Gene hates it!) Keep it real!

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