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toilet seat licker.

February 24, 2009

I can’t believe I’m about to say this…but I’m pretty sure I’m getting sick again.  I haven’t had this many colds and infections in such a short amount of time since nursery school when we are all licking our toys and then being forced to share them.  There is no logical explanation as to why my coworkers and I have been spreading sicknesses around to one another time and time again.  I swear we don’t spend our breaks french kissing or handling toilet seats.  We work in our offices and cubicles and spend inordinate amounts of time planning what and where we will eat lunch over interoffice IM. 

Today was free pancake day at IHOP, free taco day at Jack In The Box and Quiznos was giving away free sandwiches.  For all of the people suffering from job layoffs and near homelessness….today must have felt like manna was raining down from heaven.  My cube neighbor laid out a map for himself so as to hit as many of the giveaway restaurants in one lunch hour as he could without being late.  Unfortunately for me, I did not attend the free lunch day extravaganza and stayed behind with my turkey and ham sandwhich…which ended up being bad, thus causing me to experience a very hungry Tuesday afternoon.  

In my lightheaded hungry daze I must have accidentally licked someone’s infected coffee mug, because by 3pm I was holding my sore throat and giving my boss notice of the possibility that I may be absent tomorrow.  Now that I’m home after a lovely dinner with the in-laws, and in my sweat pants, I can almost assure him I won’t be there.  A day of sweat pants just sounds so much more pleasing than taking my turn to pass on the disease.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. February 24, 2009 11:14 pm

    Thank God you didn’t tip him off to your scandalous ways by posting your intentions on the internet or anything dumb like that! Whew! That would have been trouble …

  2. Bella permalink*
    February 24, 2009 11:16 pm

    If I gave him fair warning…and I do actually have a sore throat…and my pants really are comfy….

    it’s not unethical.

  3. kellimcgill permalink
    February 25, 2009 9:02 am

    laura! call joe or reda this morning & have them share their claritin miracle theory with you. joe would fight this every year…but since starting the claritin thing he hasn’t been sick once.

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