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June 26, 2008

>> Amway is back!  They actually have a blog and a commercial airing on late night cable television to make it official.  Maybe this doesn’t mean much to you….but I grew up in an Amway house.  Thats right my lovely little readers, my momma and poppa lived on top of that pyramid shaped scheme opportunity for many many years.  We even had a white board in our living room on the off chance that a stranger might wander in and not immediately catch on to the triangularly angled sales pitch.  Actually…the board was used most often when my mother would make insane lists of chores for me during the summer months.  In retaliation I would erase it all and claim she must have just forgotten her Amway vitamins.  Which usually resulted in an Amway spanking.  It’s because of this that I still hold a lot of Amway resentment. 

>> I just ate more red meat than I believe most humans should in one sitting.  I can’t help but fall back on cheeseburgers when I get truly exhausted by the stressors in life.  Most women fall back on foot massages and boxes of chocolate.  I say….cremate me a bison and melt some cheese on it while you are at it.  Right now my wedding dress is hanging up in front of me and scowling.  I think it’s scared I might rip out it’s seams.  It might be right.

>> I may actually have reached my limit on syndicated episodes of Law and Order.  I caught myself last night realizing that the victim starring in the episode I was watching, had made apperances in several other episodes of the very same show.  There was the episode where she played the wife of the man who forced her and her daughter to have children with random men for his own pleasure.  Then there was the episode where she shook her baby to death for being a “screamer”.  And finally (or at least that I know of), the episode where she plays the mother of the chubby kid who stabbed a rich drug dealer.  She must feel so accomplished.  I on the other hand, feel like one of those fanatics who know ridiculous details about the most useless thing on the planet.  I can’t remember how to find an EVA in my economics class….but I can tell you what Carrie Bradshaw wore the night that her and Aiden broke up for the last time.  Absolutely ridiculous.


One Comment leave one →
  1. June 26, 2008 11:02 pm

    I need some hand cleaner and maybe something for the nagging itch of psoriasis. Can you help?

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